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DISCLOSURES


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Some lawyers stay up at night trying to ruin free society and create new rules. Therefore, here are the disclosures I must have that you probably won't read.

Why... That's the question.

Why?



Why do I have to get up today? Why keep doing things, waking up, going to work, eating... just to pay bills, just so I can keep waking up, working, eating... round and round.

It's monotonous.

I'm in communication with my advisors right now on this question.

Forbes has an interesting, if superficial, article on Finding your why.

Up to now, from early childhood to today, my current relationship was my why. Whoever I'm loving and they're loving me, is why. But as a Widower with no real prospects of Chapter Two on the Horizon, that why is no longer available. My kids feel like they "should" be my why, but they're moving toward independence as teens/preteens. In a few years, they'll be off and running into their lives and I'll be here at the house alone.

What is my WHY?

I don't know. Honestly. At the emotional/gut level. I have intellectual answers but no satisfying why.

My post yesterday addresses this in part; however, although I know I can …

Fatalism: When bad things happen

Fatalism is not the answer!

I've had no less than four or five conversations around this general topic recently, so I decided to say something about it. Although I have several friends I want to say this to, the primary audience for this speech today is me. I spent all of yesterday in a fatalistic funk. Today, I'm choosing to make a new choice.

You are not living the life you live because of fate. Period. 

God. The Stars. Fate. They did not create the hardships you face today. There were some factors outside of you that contributed, often in major ways. But you ultimately choose how you will respond from today forward, not Fate.
Fatalism: a doctrine that events are fixed in advance so that human beings are powerless to change them. Websters Fatalism is exactly the opposite of Truth. God empowers you, he does not disempower you. If you believe you are the way you are, living the life you live, because of Fate, you are believing a LIE of Satan. That lie is keeping you bound inste…

Holy Spirit > Righteousness > Peace > Joy

For the kingdom of God does not consist of food and drink, but righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit. Romans 14:17 NET Bible

Lexicon at Bible Hub:
but righteousnessδικαιοσύνη
(dikaiosunē)1343:righteousness, justicefrom dikaiosand peaceεἰρήνη
(eirēnē)1515:of uncertain derivation, perhaps from eiró (to join): lit. or fig. peace, by impl. welfareand joyχαρὰ
(chara)5479:joy, delightfrom chairó

Righteousness: I AM, right now, regardless of failings or faults, the RIGHTEOUSNESS of Jesus in the eyes of God. I stand before my Father in right standing not because of a single thing I've done except that I accepted his Son standing in my place. When he sees me, he sees his son, in whom he is well pleased.

Peace: Eirene/Shalom: Nothing Missing. Nothing Broken. Everything Whole and Complete. This is the wellness of spirit, soul, body, mind, finances. It's an all-encompassing peace. I need not have it functioning to understand it belongs to me. I have tools I don't use in my toolbox…

Even if I am right, I guess I can still be wrong... sometimes.

Note*This is to be read with a certain self-sarcasm, a facetious tongue-in-cheek haughtiness.*
Now receive the one who is weak in the faith, and do not have disputes over differing opinions. NET Bible Romans 14:1
I got an attitude check last night. 
Often I'm so sure I'm right about some point (and I usually am) that I make blanket statements other's either misunderstand or vehemently disagree with.

Among other issues, they couldn't possibly come to the same conclusion I had about this issue unless they had first come with me on the journey for all the other revelations leading up to it.

Also, there may be more loving less dogmatic ways of communicating this new insight without alienating well-meaning (if wrong) people.

Furthermore, I can communicate an accurate statement in a wrong attitude and by extension be wrong myself. For attitude, not facts, is the bigger and more important sign of spiritual and emotional maturity.

In addition, it's possible (however unli…

The Bell Tolls For Thee... Perspectives on Pain and Suffering

No man is an island,  entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main; if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as well as if a manor of thy friend's or of thine own were;  any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee. John Donne Meditation 17
We are All Connected 
Before cell phones, WiFi, Social Media, Email, Cars, or even Electricity... small rural towns had the Church Bell to communicate mass messages. The Bell Tolls to communicate something important has happened, and get our attention.
John Donne, a pastor-poet in 1635, was suffering from an illness he was sure would lead to his death. He wrote the above quote after hearing the Bell Toll for the passing of his neighbor. He wondered if he was so ill his family tolled it for him, thinking he was dead.

When he says "it tolls for thee", Donne rea…

What if you could make a 1% improvement to your life each day?

What if you could make a 1% improvement to your life each day?
This morning on my walk,

God said: "I'm proud of you."

I said: "I don't feel proud of myself..." and then started crying. "I'm still stuck in broken thinking cycles, rehearsing the past, scheming tomorrow in fear, and all the things that I've been stuck in for years."

He said: "But unlike before, you are pressing into those feelings. You're sitting in them instead of running from them and numbing them with distractions. You're letting them process all the way through you and back out of you. You're pressing into "The Suck" and letting me walk you through the valley of the shadow of death. You're no longer camping in the valley, but walking through it each time, and coming out the other side."

As I thought about it, I am spending less time there in The Suck each day. I can snap out faster, go there less often.


What if you could make a 1% impr…

No Hiding... My Story

Why am I writing my story? So... here's the thing. The Pure Desire, Seven Pillars workbook asks me to write an addiction story. When I was __ this happened. Then this happened. Timeline style.

The workbook and videos also break down the limbic system, and how desires, fears, and auto-responses were mostly created early, before 6 years old, give or take.

I've been thinking about my history and timeline for years, wondering why I am the way I am. So this sounds like promising homework. I started in on paper, but the deep level I want to travel will take more space. I plan to outline every relevant (or possibly relevant) moment.

Also, I'm inspired to start again because of a KPBS special "Meet the Patels", in which Ravi Patel (as shown through the lens of his sister's (Geeta Patel's - Film Maker) camera. It's a long story, worth seeing. It showed the struggles of American dating vs the arranged or partially-arranged type marriage systems their culture us…

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DISCLOSURES

DISCLOSURES

Some lawyers stay up at night trying to ruin free society and create new rules. Therefore, here are the disclosures I must have that you probably won't read.

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Darrell's Reading List


Here are some books I've been reading lately:
  • Hacker: The Outlaw Chronicles (here) by Ted Dekker (Author). The story of a young Hacker girl, who went on a wild adventure into the supernatural realm beyond trying to save her mom, but saved her self too in the process.
  • Saint: A Paradise Novel (here) by Ted Dekker (Author). He's an assassin, or is he? He finds a secret to his past that unlocks supernatural abilities, at a cost.
  • For a full list of all my book suggestions, see my Amazon Store.

Other sites I follow: