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DISCLOSURES

Some lawyers stay up at night trying to ruin free society and create new rules. Therefore, here are the disclosures I must have that you probably won't read.

What did God say again????!

What has God been telling you that you thought you understood but maybe need to go back and ask Him about? Are there instructions He gave that you added to/subtracted from? Is it possible you miss-understood His instruction, even though it was simple. How simple is "Sing to me"? What has God told you? Are you sure that's what He said... the WAY He said it?

On December 7th 2002 I was sitting on a rest stop picnic table. I was smoking, again... I was contemplating joining the Air Force. I finally got approval to go in after trying for three years. I thought I had made up my mind to go in. Little did I know my life was about to have an Damascus road turn around.

The LORD said to me; and I paraphrase it's been a long time:

"If you don't stop smoking you may never sing again." 
Then...
"I don't need you to sing to do what I called you to do."
Silence...

I said to myself: "I don't think He's kidding..." I thought about it for what felt like an eternity (But was probably less than 60 seconds) and put the cigarette down and stomped it out. Ironically I tried to offer the rest of the pack to the attendant at the snack shack there and he said "No, I'm trying to quit." I guess it rubbed off on him too! So I broke that pack up and threw them out.

No withdrawals, no pains, done! Years later, occasionally during times of great emotional stress, I feel a physical/mental/emotional? urge to return to smoking. But I just put that imagination down and keep going without another thought.

Center Photo there is a rock in the water.
Just a few feet off the shore.
Water on all sides, playing worship songs in anger.
That must of been a sight! LOL
Interestingly, the next day I decided to rededicate my life to the Lordship of Jesus Christ and stop following my own way. I didn't do it nicely either. I just got told by my friends praying mother that: "The Airforce is the best thing that ever happened to my son... and you are not supposed to go. You need to pray about where God's calling you to serve!" With that I was kept for the night when I only meant to stay for an hour... I left the next day heavy in thought and prayer. 08/08/2002 Spiritually reborn.

You see for me the Airforce was Tarshish. Ministry was my Nineveh. I took my guitar to Gaviotta State Beach. I sat out on a rock with my guitar and played worship songs mad at God... weird huh? Finally I broke down and said: "OK FINE! What do you want from me?!?! I'll do anything but preach!" He told me to return to music. I said..."I'll do anything but preach or music..." He said "You asked." I said "OK fine. You make it so clear to me that I am to return to music that I can't deny it was you and I'll do it." He said "Fine." I said "Oh C***... I think He meant that too." That was a Thursday. Sunday a woman who'd never met me or heard of me and I'd never met walked up to me and asked me..."Excuse me..." she said sheepishly at first... "Do you play guitar?" I said "Yes." She said I've been praying about starting a band and I couldn't take my eyes off of you, it was almost like there was a spot light on you all service. If you'd pray about..." I interrupted her. "I don't need to pray about it, God told me about you last Thursday... when do we start?" I also became worship leader/co leader of the Junior High team.

Jericho Tribe the rock worship band was born. Friendships were forged. It didn't last long. I don't know that God may not have a place for it yet... But it started me on a new path. Within less than one year I was baptized in the Holy Spirit speaking in tongues. Became uncomfortable at the church I was at. Became un-needed as worship leader of the Junior High because the pastor wanted to use Cd's for awhile. Un-needed and uncomfortable because tongues wasn't highly thought of... I was ushered into the Pentecostal Church and eventually Word of Faith. I met my wife that year, and we've been working toward the plan of God ever since, despite many self caused detours, mostly by me.

He has also said repeatedly throughout the years "Sing to me like you did when you were young"

So why am I bringing this up now? It's 9.5 years later?

Last night I was singing... and praising God. Praying and Singing by and in the Spirit and tongues... I hit a break through point. I was so used to singing with new vigor, spirit led words, new vocal patterns it was great...

Then the LORD spoke again:
"I said that 



"If you don't stop smoking you may never sing again." 


"I don't need you to sing to do what I called you to do."


However, you took that to mean that music/singing wasn't a part of your calling. It's not primary to your calling, but it's in the fullness of your calling."  


Then it occurred to me that it would be odd for that to mean it wasn't in my calling if the next thing He asked me to do the next day was return to music... it also occurred to me that I'd taken his instruction to sing to him like I did when I was younger and made it about playing worship songs to him on the guitar. I was frustrated with my lack of growth in the guitar so I would put it down, which kept me from growing, which kept me from playing, which kept me from growing... you get the idea...

It occurred to me then... for the first time since he game that instruction which I believe was... 2005-2006 some time... I don't NEED a guitar to sing... HA HA HA! What a concept. I don't need music, Cd's, anything... voice and words are the only requirements for singing. Sometimes I've been known to be a bit dense.

So what now? I guess I don't know what now. I'm going to start by singing... daily... as often as I can. In the car on the way to work... walking through halls, at breaks, lunches, etc... I suppose I'll try to learn/grow further on my guitar... but I think, even as I say that, the guitar must wait until I have built a habit and lifestyle of this singing to God. Then music can be a passion and not a frustrating experience. Yes. I think that's what I'll do. For now. Praise God for his patience.

Who knows... maybe I'll look back at today's post and say: "My my my... that was the start of an amazing set of events!" Just like I do now at that day.


What has God been telling you that you thought you understood but maybe need to go back and ask Him about? Are there instructions He gave that you added to/subtracted from? Is it possible you miss-understood His instruction, even though it was simple. How simple is "Sing to me"? What has God told you? Are you sure that's what He said... the WAY He said it?  


Darrell G. Wolfe

Comments

  1. Hi son, I was thinking, sometimes just playing guitar for the basics of singing or playing for a praise group is enough. when I was told to pick up my guitar and play back for CVCC, I could only play praise songs, if I tried to play anything else, I failed miserably.

    A few weeks ago at Shabbot Services (Fri night Messianic)I was sharing with a girl about life and she said "pick up your guitar again, you are suppose to be serving".. haven't done it yet, as a matter of fact forgot till just now..

    I notice your brothers Factory is here on your page.. He is starting night shift soon..

    love Mom

    ReplyDelete

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DISCLOSURES

DISCLOSURES

Some lawyers stay up at night trying to ruin free society and create new rules. Therefore, here are the disclosures I must have that you probably won't read.

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Darrell's Reading List


Here are some books I've been reading lately:
  • Hacker: The Outlaw Chronicles (here) by Ted Dekker (Author). The story of a young Hacker girl, who went on a wild adventure into the supernatural realm beyond trying to save her mom, but saved her self too in the process.
  • Saint: A Paradise Novel (here) by Ted Dekker (Author). He's an assassin, or is he? He finds a secret to his past that unlocks supernatural abilities, at a cost.
  • For a full list of all my book suggestions, see my Amazon Store.

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