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DISCLOSURES

Some lawyers stay up at night trying to ruin free society and create new rules. Therefore, here are the disclosures I must have that you probably won't read.

Dishes make my want to cry or scream, depending on the day.


I can tell my emotional state by looking at the sink.


In my home, we've decided the dishes and trash fall under my domain. These are my contribution to the household. I feel better if I do them at night before bed, and wake up to a clean kitchen.

Sometimes, many times, when get home from work and I look at the sink I feel an overwhelming flood of emotion. I don't know what this emotion is. It comes out as anger, but anger is almost always not a root emotion. Anger is usually a reaction to another emotion you don't want to experience or admit.

The task stands before me, it seems daunting, and the only word I that comes to mind is "overwhelming". It's as though the sink is about to swallow me. I often want to sit on the ground in the kitchen, and cry. But since I haven't really cried since I was a teenager, I just stare at it. I either shut down entirely, blank-emotional state, or I get angry.

I might try to blame my anger on my wife and kids: "Why do you just pile all this crap up in here?" But that's not really it. I'm not mad at them. I'm mad at my own inability to process simple emotions, to the point that dishes make me want to lay down and die.

In his book "The Mars and Venus Diet and Exercise Solution", John Gray discusses the differences between male and female brain chemistry. He described most of my problems with emotional state in terms of brain science and chemical imbalance, and it was remarkable how accurate it was.

Neurotransmitters, Serotonin and Dopamine, react differently in men and women.

Women tend to be more naturally Serotonin deficient. This leads to less feelings of wellbeing or peace or optimism. Connection with other people, helps the body produce higher levels of this chemical; hence the need for women to connect and talk more often.

Meanwhile, men tend to be more naturally Dopamine deficient. John Gray describes on his blog, "Dopamine is the brain chemical that gives us pleasure, increases our focus and makes us feel good". Without this chemical, the male cannot focus or feel good.

Men wake up in the morning with a finite amount of this Dopamine chemical. They go into the day, and use this as they perform decision making, or focus, tasks. When they come home, they have depleted this chemical, and tend to be "lazy" in mind and body. Talking requires focus and drains this chemical, so they don't want to talk, which the wife needs to refill her Serotonin. This creates a negative spiral of "I need what you don't have to get what I don't have".

Tasks help create more Dopamine. So this dis-engaged male, can go into task mode and come 'alive' again, as this helps to produce more of the needed chemical. This explains why I often feel better if I can push though my overwhelming feeling, and start doing the dishes as a "task". It helps to temporarily re-charge my tank.


Sometimes I just can't get past it. I need to shut down, either through sleep, or mindless scrolling through feeds.

So... that's interesting.

Darrell

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DISCLOSURES

DISCLOSURES

Some lawyers stay up at night trying to ruin free society and create new rules. Therefore, here are the disclosures I must have that you probably won't read.

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Darrell's Reading List


Here are some books I've been reading lately:
  • Hacker: The Outlaw Chronicles (here) by Ted Dekker (Author). The story of a young Hacker girl, who went on a wild adventure into the supernatural realm beyond trying to save her mom, but saved her self too in the process.
  • Saint: A Paradise Novel (here) by Ted Dekker (Author). He's an assassin, or is he? He finds a secret to his past that unlocks supernatural abilities, at a cost.
  • For a full list of all my book suggestions, see my Amazon Store.

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Shalom: Live Long and Prosper!
Darrell Wolfe (DG Wolfe) Storyteller | Writer | Thinker | Consultant @ DarrellWolfe.com


I Collect Churches

So I have a confession... I have a strange hobby. Some people collect toys, cars, stamps. Some people visit museums, zoos, arboretums.



I... collect church experiences. I visit churches and collect insights on the differences between them, leadership styles, music styles, facility choices, and the overall experience. I collect pastoral teaching and teaching styles. I collect theology and theological differences.
I didn't know it was a hobby at first. I thought I was just "looking for a home church", or looking for something I hadn't found yet. I thought I just hadn't found my place...

Some of that is true. But really, I somewhat accidentally turned studying church into a hobby. Maybe it's because I was a pastor's kid and saw some of the inside workings from a unique perspective. Maybe it's because I secretly, and not so secretly, feel I am supposed to be a pastor but I'm still trying desperately to be anything else.

Maybe it's because Church, …

Writing Prompt | Room and Bored

At the Heart Writers group meeting tonight, led by Lauren Stinton, we did a short writing prompt.

You have seven minutes to write (fiction or nonfiction) and it must include these three items/themes:

Jesus is Lord of allPrincessCat
Here is my result, with a bit of post-meeting editing and addition. Keep in mind, I wrote it in OneNote on my phone...

*** Room and Bored The light amplified through the double glass window pane, despite the clawed dusty drapes, warming Princess' furry belly. She was Queen of this castle and she held the honor with dignity.

Her human was a good servant. He brought her food at the appointed time. He changed her box. He performed his part admirably.

Then her life shattered.

Her human walked in the front door and laid a box on the table. "Princess, I have a surprise for you, " He said.

She rolled off the couch back and sauntered over. The pawed the box. It moved. She jumped back, "Moew," she cried.

A soft rumble came from the box.

Her hu…

Job Research: Regional Maps

http://bibleatlas.org/teman.htm

TEMAN


te'-man (teman, "on the right," i.e. "south"; Thaiman): The name of a district and town in the land of Edom, named after Teman the grandson of Esau, the son of his firstborn, Eliphaz (Genesis 36:11 1 Chronicles 1:36). A duke Teman is named among the chiefs or clans of Edom (Genesis 36:42 1 Chronicles 1:53). He does not however appear first, in the place of the firstborn. Husham of the land of the Temanites was one of the ancient kings of Edom (Genesis 36:34 1 Chronicles 1:45). From Obad 1:9 we gather that Teman was in the land of Esau (Edom). In Amos 1:12 it is named along with Bozrah, the capital of Edom. In Ezekiel 25:13 desolation is denounced upon Edom: "From Teman even unto Dedan shall they fall by the sword." Dedan being in the South, Teman must be sought in the North Eusebius, Onomasticon knows a district in the Gebalene region called Theman, and also a town with the same name, occupied by a Roman garrison, 1…

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Recently, I said I wasn't religious but I did have a relationship with Jesus. The person replied that is a "textbook" response for a Christian; therefore, I am a Christian; therefore, I am religious.

I have to laugh because "religion" is the dead following of dead traditions. The difference between my two-way relationship with a real living person (Jesus) and a religious person is the difference between a Tree and a Motorcycle. They have nothing to do with one-another.

Yet, I can see how they get it. Religious people would read this passage and see something totally different than I see, yet we read the same passage.
...anyone who has died has been set free from sin... In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus... Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness? Roma…

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